01/07/2022
I wrote this a while back... I think it might deserve another run.
WAS I A MONSTER?
I have been small minded and myopic. I have been prejudicial and unenlightened. I have cried when I did not get what I want and stubbornly refused to accept things that were good for me. If I did not fully understand something, I refused to believe. I have hit when angered, repaid violence with violence and hurt others without provocation. I have demanded that my needs be met regardless of hardships that placed on others. I have sated my own appetite while blind to the hunger and thirst of others.
Was I a monster? No. I was an INFANT.
Are those behaviors gone forever? Sadly, no. On my worst days some of those infantile ways of being reappear. If these traits were my current default I would be in serious need of growing up. One of the most important tasks of growing up is understanding that I am not the center of this universe and that my actions impact others…. And that matters. Most of us do grow up. Leaving the majority of those behaviors in the past (for the most part). It would be bizarre to look at a grown person, acting like a grown person, responsible compassionate and engaged, and remember only the child that they were. We grow, we learn, we change, and that process continues until we have breathed our last.
I must constantly remind myself that when I face someone that resembles the first paragraph of this piece that their story is incomplete. It is equally important for me to remember that refusing to change my view of someone genuinely seeking redemption or forgiveness is like ascribing the attributes of an infant to a grown and responsible individual.
Patience, appreciation, grace, and forgiveness are sadly lacking in the world we walk today. I commit today to apply those values in my interactions with others I challenge you to join me.
David D. Blackwell EdS