13/07/2024
Dear Mom,
This Saturday, it will be a month since you left us. I try not to dwell on how much you are missed here on Earth, but that can be easier said than done. I am often told how you are happier in heaven but honestly, that never makes me feel better. Actually, if I am completely honest, that thought makes me a bit angry. I don’t want you to be happier in heaven, I want you to be here with us. I want to talk to you, I want to see you, and I want you to be there for all the boys’ events, birthdays, and life milestones, no matter if they are big or small.
I hate that you left us so soon, and even more so when I know that I never got the chance to say goodbye. Maybe I am being selfish, but I don’t care, I think in this situation I am allowed to be unreasonable and selfish. I just want to have you back in my day-to-day life. You used to be the first person I called when I was upset, scared, confused, or happy. I miss your advice, your jokes, and even your bad days. I know that things got hard in the end and that I was often frustrated with you. I am sorry for that, it was really never you, but the circumstances. I know you were just as frustrated at being trapped in a suffering body that no longer worked as your mind did, and that is my only silver lining in knowing that you are no longer in your earthly body.
I miss you every day, Mom, and I pray you are able to see my accomplishments and even my sorrows. To feel that you are still a guiding light in my life and supporting me from heaven helps. You were always my biggest cheerleader and fan. You were the first to teach me the concept of unconditional love which is the best gift you gave me in life.
I love you and hope I will continue to make you proud as I celebrate your life and honor you by being the very best me that I can be.
i love you my one and only mom.
